It's okay not to be okay

By Fan Wenrui (19J11), Hudson Zhao (20J05)


Have you ever felt

  • overwhelmed and stressed by the amount of homework to do and tests to mug for?

  • out of place in school, and pressured to fit yourself into a clique?

  • like an absolute failure for spending too much time on social media, and too little on homework?

  • that you’re just a complete “loser” with your current GPA/rank points and portfolio?


If you do, don’t worry! It is perfectly normal to feel stressed or even burnt out. While we face our own storms and battles, it might be inevitable that we become our own worst critic.


However, we need to remember that we are only human and it is definitely okay to not be ok.


Acknowledging this is the first step you should take to become a better version of yourself.


Embrace yourself for who you are one day at a time. It’s not about becoming someone “perfect”, but rather, a process of self-discovery.


It’s okay to be imperfect

Have you ever received a bad grade for a common test and felt like it was the end of the world? Or felt disgusted and angry at yourself for putting on pounds on the scale?


Be kinder to yourself.


Try setting realistic expectations that you can reach, as a huge margin between expectations and reality could cause great disappointment.


Stop taunting yourself for your body size. And stop yearning to be yet another bone-thin Instagram model. It isn’t worth it to count calories, restrict yourself, turn away from your favourite foods just to be “validated” by society or conform to the societal expectation of being thin. We are who we are. Stand your ground. Be strong.


Please don’t treat eating as a sin. Live in the moment, enjoy every savoury bite of food. Be proud of your body, for it is the very vessel that has gone through so much with you.


Ultimately, every body type is unique in its own and different way, and you don’t need to live up to feel compelled to fit into that one particular mould of beauty standard.


While it is true that all body sizes and types are beautiful, it is not a valid reason to stay out of shape either. Be sure to nourish your body with nutritious and healthy food too! Remember, you are what you eat and eating healthier will make you feel better and hence helping you to achieve much more. Ultimately, being healthy both physically and mentally could help you go a long way in life.



Be comfortable in your own skin, and remember, never let a number (or anything, for that matter) define your self-worth, as it is not representative of who you are as a person.




Stop comparing yourself with your peers who are getting better grades, are more sociable, have a larger follower base on social media or have more achievements under their belt. You could be meant for other greater things!


Life is a marathon. It is normal (and completely okay) to lose your way, trip and tumble, or feel completely unmotivated to continue.

What’s more important is to pick yourself up and continue your journey, regardless of the hurdles that you may face.


Life is way too short to be unkind to yourself. Just because you are not who you want to be now does not mean that you will never reach your goal. All you need is a little more patience and some faith in yourself.


And if you are looking for a place to start, why not start by:

  • Drinking more water

  • Going for walks to unwind

  • Aim to complete three things on your to-do lists everyday to end everyday with a sense of fulfilment

  • Gain greater clarity by journaling your thoughts


It’s okay

...to eat

...to sleep

...to feel sad

...to feel angry

...ask for help

...to feel anxious

...to feel depressed

...to be unproductive

…to feel disappointed

...to not want to socialise

...to not have it figured out yet

...to cut out toxic people from your social circle

...And so much more! The list could (and should) go on and on.


If you are still struggling with your emotions, do not hesitate to open up to your friends, confide in a trusted teacher or even the school counselor. Mental health professionals are also easy to reach!


To find out a little more about mental health and mental illnesses and their hotlines, click here!


You are just one call away from receiving the help that you deserve and need.






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